Sunday, 29 April 2012

Chapter 116 : Questions


Well I guess they gave me the wrong name then. I laughed in a sad kind of way letting my eyes drop to the floor. The smile leaving my face as quickly as it came. She was wrong, I was not beautiful.

 If I argued with you is there any chance I would win the fight? Esmee asked

 Not a chance. You dont see what I do in the mirror.

 Mi, there are many more kinds of beauty than cosmetic beauty. When your head is better and when your mind is ready, I will tell you about them.  Esmee smiled back at me.

 We walked together in silence for a bit with only the purring of a very contented Buttercup and the chirping of the birds interrupting it. Somewhere off of the end road you could hear the gentle whooshing of traffic too.

The beauty of the surroundings was astounding. Nothing like what was expected of a psychiatric unit. I had never really considered it when I was on the other side of the fence, when the tall three story red brick building that towered beside me wasnt what I had to call home. It was still hard to believe that I had now been in there for a month, what was harder still was apart from the short journey between the main building and the school I had not been out in a month either and my mind began to drift to all the questions that it had been concealing. I mean what was happening out there? How would of little rosy grown? Had Annie and Paul ever forgiven me? Did they miss me? Did they even remember me? My mind even floated to my mother. Where was she now? Who was she with now? Did she ever find another bloke? Was he in turn using her as a punch bag? Had she once again made a close friend at the bottom of a bottle of vodka? Did she miss me? Did she ever regret throwing me out? Did she even know I was here? Was she even alive?

 Youre crying Mi. Esmee suddenly said breaking me out of my trance like wondering it was then that I noticed we had already done one circuit around the unit grounds. I also noticed and felt the moisture leaking form my eyes that Esmee referred to.

 I guess I am. I replied wiping the tears away. There was no point in lying and saying I wasnt. it would have been like saying the sky was orange.

 Tell me. Esmee prompted and to my utter surprise I started talking.

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