Chapter 12 : Sentence passed

“Isn’t that the big red brick NHS house up the road from here?”


“Yeah that’s the place. I have had a lot of people like you spend some time there for a little while, just to get them though the worst of times, I am normally based there and I work with over half of the clients. It’s very nice. You get your own room and things and you can put pictures up on your walls. Not to mention all the organized activities and things planed. You might have seen them all out in the grounds playing with oversized games and things.” Doctor Jordan smiled. I laughed.

“Don’t patronise me, it’s a children’s phsyc unit, a hospital, nothing more, nothing less and I hardly see how oversized board games make up for the fact that they are all enclosed behind fifteen foot fences complete with security lighting,” I commented bitterly. “It’s not a holiday camp. It’s for the sick.”


“That might be true, but you are sick and it does do a good job at keeping people safe and making them better, so how about yourself and I head off over there in a bit and have a look around If they have got time to see us?”

Now I was confused, even scared. what did Apple gate have to do with me? I had walked past there on my way to school many times before and yes I had seen the patients out in the grounds playing games and things with giant chess boards, while nurses in informal Jeans and t-shirts over looked and encouraged, and the patients always had smiles on there faces, however There was the other side too. The side that made mothers grip onto their children’s hands and cross over the road, the side that sent my ears ringing and my feet running for cover. For with the games and laughter came the shouting alarms and the horrendous screaming. Yes I admit Apple gate always intrigued me but I was always safe behind the tall fence peeking through the gaps at people life’s that where worse then mine. A safe distance from a place I would, and should never know.


“Why would I want to look at apple gate?” I asked


“Because I think a short stay there would really help you at the moment.”

I went cold. My mind had told me this was where his thoughts was heading when he had been talking, but I couldn’t believe it, yet now it had been confirmed. My stomach lurched. Bile rushed up my throat and I expelled it into one of the dishes that was left on my bedside table. Dr. Jordan was on his feet and by my side in seconds pushing the Illuminated nurse call button on my pillow.


“Ok honey,” Dr. Jordan soothed pulling my hair back off my shoulders and out of the bowel of vomit.


“I’m not insane,” I wheezed heaving again, pulling all the muscles in my stomach and chest trying to get everything out of me including the realization that I was to spend time in Apple gate and be one of the ones encaged behind the fence.


“I know your not Mi, but you do need help.” Dr Jordan said throwing a piece of tissue in on top of the vomit I had just expelled while I slumped my body back up against my pillows exhausted and out of breath.

“Here you go Honey,” Dr Jordan soothed again, pulling an oxygen mask over my face. “Breath deeply.” I gratefully sucked in huge lung full’s of air even though I hated being given oxygen, I was still under the impression I didn’t deserve to breath.

“I’m going to go and see where that nurse is and make a call to the unit. See if we can get you a bed for when you are discharged from here.” Dr. Jordan winked at me and with a flip of the curtains he was gone. Case closed. Sentence passed.